Meditation #16 -- the Witch, the Accursed, and me

The Witch, the dream-destroyer, she of truths and gifts that bind,
Born from the fevered Hell of the Abundance-Maker's mind,
Appeared to me that ghastly night to give the greatest gift,
To banish fear, but choice as well, her judgment hard and swift.

Unwanted, unbelievable, 'til with a wicked smile,
She showed me what I'd not dared see, to vanquish all denial.
An insubstantial web of magic, girding all the Earth,
Her net to trap and torment both myself and the Accursed.

And from her verdict there is no appeal.....

Each day I face that battle none can ever truly win,
As madness grows in flight from what I once called harmless sin.
And every time I turn the Witch's proffered cure away,
I know it will return, for she wields demons none can slay.

I dream this is my destiny, to fail and to fall;
I too am now her demon, the most wicked of them all.
And through the web the Hellfire races, merciless and straight,
To work the Witch's will, not mine, for such is now my fate.

And I, I have nothing at stake.....

But, o Accursed, you irked the Witch; she gave you too a gift;
It was your cold ingratitude that cut your soul adrift.
I see you as I knew you, as you were and next will be:
Accusing, raging, dreading what you know but cannot see.

How foolish to refuse the dark delights that sin can give!
In fear of life, to cringe, obey, and never truly live.
Let magic teach you, year by year, as only magic can,
To see the ghastly beauty in the Witch's nightmare plan.

And horror becomes glory.....

"Accept the Witch's gift, for you're already paying the price!"
That's what I'd tell you, but..... should I now take my own advice?
Delirious I hear her voice anew, its silky guile
Laying bare the wisdom she'd kept hid behind that wicked smile.

The battle's over now, and I no longer win nor lose;
Let nature take its course, for that's the one path I can choose.
The magic web has shown me what your coldness never could;
If demon I must be, then let this evil be my good.

And now I have everything at stake.....

Now and forever, you remain the Accursed.
Now and forever, I remain..... whatever this is that I have become.
And the Witch?  The Witch.....
I know only thankfulness now.

[Dedicated to R and MB]