04 December 2021

Improving words (22)

Some more revised word definitions, based on what the words visibly should mean.....

Abundance:  A performance of moving to music, with a bread roll

Adolescent:  A smell given off by a handout

Beanstalk:  Well, if you hear them doing so, you are probably delusional (could also be an euphemism for farting)

Bobbing:  Hope and Crosby

Catatonic:  A feline used for medicinal purposes

Charming:  To roast a Flash Gordon villain

Covet:  An assistant animal doctor

Electron:  Vote for Ronald!

Gargoyle:  A small non-Jewish person who is also a specific type of fish

Glutton:  A supply so excessive it weighs 2,000 pounds

Heathen:  To warm up a chicken

Horn:  A prostitute who is also a registered nurse

Impact:  The action of a small demon

Intern:  Swallowed by a seabird

Kindred:  A benevolent communist

Nightingale:  The hours of darkness spent in a high wind

Noticed:  Never frozen

Paltry:  A friend's attempt

Patriot:  To caress an outbreak of street violence

Shambling:  Fake jewelry

Spanking:  A monarch of bridges

Tartan:  A sunburn caused by asphalt

[The previous "improving words" post is here.]


Blogger Mike said...

I think I'll head out to a bridge now and declare myself, SPAN KING! But I want to be careful not to fall into the cold water. I want to be noticed.

04 December, 2021 00:52  
Blogger Lady M said...

Beanstalk - I like that as a euphemism for farting! I thought abundance would have had something to do with ones behind instead of bread but I guess you just not as sketchy as I am.

04 December, 2021 06:04  
Blogger NickM said...

I find these always very funny. But, here's another challenge... How about collective nouns? I mean English has some excellent collective nouns (I like "a shrewdness of apes" but could with some more: "an hypocrisy of Conservatives"?

04 December, 2021 09:01  
Anonymous Ole phat stu said...

Euphemeism = opposite of
Meforyouism ?

04 December, 2021 10:24  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

Mike: As long as you don't spend a nightingale, you should be OK.

Lady M: Hmm, I need to raise my game. I don't want to be out-sketchyed.

NickM: I'm sure there are plenty of those one could come up with, but I think I've found my own niche here.

Phat: Plausible enough -- but mine are based on spelling rather than pronunciation.

04 December, 2021 11:07  
Blogger NickM said...

In the late '90s the UK based utilities company Powergen decided to get into the Italian market and therefore needed a website for this new venture. They registered... "powergenitalia.co.it" to much ribald comment from Shetland to Sicily...

04 December, 2021 16:23  
Blogger SickoRicko said...

Some of these made me LOL!

04 December, 2021 17:35  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

NickM: I think all corporate names, logos, URLs, etc should be pre-reviewed by a committee of 13-year-old boys who would be able to spot blunders like that, since overpaid executives don't seem to be able to.

Ricko: Then I've done my job.....

05 December, 2021 01:34  

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