20 April 2010

Holy man announces cause of earthquakes

Forget all secular-humanist talk of plate tectonics -- senior Iranian cleric Hojatoleslam Kazem Sedighi has announced that the real cause of earthquakes is women who "do not dress modestly".

The clergyman's pronouncement does leave me a bit puzzled as to why earthquakes are so rare in Scandinavia and eastern Europe but so common in the Middle East. As an alternate hypothesis, perhaps earthquakes are actually caused by wearing beards and turbans and talking rubbish?

Update: Blag Hag has proposed an experiment to test Sedighi's hypothesis. Mark your calendar for 26 April.

15 Comments:

Blogger magpie said...

In high summer women in Australia wear very little indeed (remote aboriginal communities still go about naked) yet this is one of the most geologically stable areas on Earth.

Perhaps Allah digs bikini lines.

20 April, 2010 04:50  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

Magpie: A valuable datum, both in terms of Sedighi's theory and in terms of possible sites for my next vacation. Thanks.

20 April, 2010 05:47  
Blogger tnlib said...

Maybe this holy one should get together with that other holy guy?

20 April, 2010 06:00  
Blogger Silverfiddle said...

That one had me laughing too. I heard Pat Robertson agreed with him.

20 April, 2010 06:22  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

TNLib: Not sure which other holy guy you mean? I think they're all nuts.

SF: I thought Pat Robertson thinks gays cause earthquakes? Or do they cause meteors? It's hard to keep track.

20 April, 2010 07:01  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

Gays cause meteors and volcanos -- and terrist attacks, Infidel. Sigh. How many times must we repeat it?

Promiscuous women (= women) are behind everything else. It's really easy to remember, yanno?

20 April, 2010 10:46  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

P.S. Blag Hag's experiment is most excellent, if I may say so myself. I will look forward to tremors and shakes, staying in the basement, just in case.

I've tried a light version of it this morning, driving Junior to school only in my bathrobe (yes, our lives are busy), but, drats, nothing happened. I must be doing it wrong. Will consult with my husband-the-scientist on the proper experimental procedure. I'm sure he'll have some useful input in the matter.

20 April, 2010 10:52  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

Volcanos too? Who would have thought there were so many gays in Iceland?

I'll have to send Blag Hag's cleavage brigade a list of targets to congregate around.

20 April, 2010 10:53  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

Hmmm. Well, as I commented at BH's, this is an experiment that needs to be run numerous times to get plenty of data. Keep trying:-)

I wonder if the earthquakes are an indirect effect, caused by overweight mullahs in the vicinity having heart attacks and thudding heavily to the ground.

20 April, 2010 11:20  
Blogger Shaw Kenawe said...

Who knew the mullahs had their own version of our Pat Robertson?

At least we know that religious nuttery is the same worldwide.

20 April, 2010 12:42  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

Well, as I commented at BH's, this is an experiment that needs to be run numerous times to get plenty of data. Keep trying:-)

Infidel, you do sound like my husband... Those rational minds, they are all alike. ;)

20 April, 2010 12:53  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

SK: Yep, they're all the same, I think. The difference between countries is in how much power the nutters have.

Elizabeth: Hey, spiritual longings aren't the only kind:-)

20 April, 2010 13:30  
Blogger tnlib said...

Infidel, I was thinking of the pope but I guess it should be all of them.

20 April, 2010 15:58  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

I'm sure the Pope wishes that criticism of the Church attracted meteors -- of course nowadays that would leave very little of the world unscathed.

20 April, 2010 16:25  
Anonymous anita said...

I think that The clergyman's pronouncement does leave me a bit puzzled as to why earthquakes are so rare in Scandinavia,,

09 June, 2010 23:43  

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