Some guidelines I've found useful
1. Following the news will be far less stressful if you read only solution-focused items, not problem-focused ones. If the gist of a post or article is "moan, groan, look how bad and terrible and awful this is, we're doomed", then don't bother reading it. Read only items which focus on what is being done to solve problems, to resist and mitigate evils. You will still be reasonably well-informed, but without wallowing in negativity.
2. You are not obligated to provide entertainment for trolls. If somebody insists on trying to pick fights with you, delete or block or ignore him (whatever is appropriate for the type of forum or situation you're in) and go on with what you were doing. I have dealt with several determined harassers, both on the internet and in pre-internet times. Arguing with them doesn't make them go away. Reasoning with them doesn't make them go away. Publicly calling them out doesn't make them go away. Completely ignoring them is the only thing that consistently works -- eventually.
3. On any platform that has an algorithm recommending content for you to view, be aware that it is probably suggesting things that will make you feel angry or agitated (I have particularly noticed YouTube doing this), and be prepared to actively avoid all such content, even if it looks interesting at first. The sole purpose of the algorithm is to keep you engaged so the platform can show you more ads. It does not care about your mental health.
4. You cannot claim to be well-informed if you read only sources of information which align with your own beliefs. Pretty much every source has some kind of bias, and the commonest way that bias manifests itself is not distortion of the news but omission -- that is, simply not mentioning events or data which conflict with the preferred narrative. People who read only sources that match their own belief system will often end up completely unaware of important information, and thus risk sounding like idiots when discussing what is happening.
5. Never hide your interests or feel shame about them. Some of them may get you denounced as a snob, while others may cause you to be mocked for liking something "lowbrow", but it doesn't matter. It's the people who share your interests that matter, and how can they find you if you don't show them?
6. Fully and guiltlessly accept whatever good fortune comes your way, no matter how unearned you may feel it to be. You've surely had episodes of undeserved bad luck in your life too. Think of it as balancing out.
7. Show appreciation for the positive things people contribute. And if you haven't been doing that, then hold your tongue when they do something you don't like.
8. You learn more from listening than from talking. People who constantly chatter about themselves end up knowing little about others, while others know everything about them. Who has the advantage there?
9. If you live your life the way somebody else thinks you should want to live it, you won't get another life to live the way you actually did want to live it.
10. It's not true that everyone is alike deep down. Some people really are very different from you and have completely different needs and drives.
11. Common sense and concrete results are more important than philosophical or ideological consistency.
12. One genuinely new and interesting idea is worth more than a hundred affirmations of what you already know or believe.
13. Always fact-check, verify sources, test claims and hypotheses against hard evidence. No matter how much you want something to be true, what matters is whether it actually is true.
14. As much as possible, avoid worrying about things you can't do anything about.
15. You exist for your own sake, not to serve some abstraction like "society".
16. People can change. But they usually don't.
posted by Infidel753 at 10:54 PM
9 Comments:
Good points to consider, Infidel. Self care is paramount these days with all the vectors of disinformation and raw emotions coming at us. It feels like it can take a lot more energy to maintain positivity in our individual lives.
I've done a lot to circle the wagons closer in recent years. To let go of the garbage. Interesting, I'm learning to let myself feel... good about me. It feels good to feel good; you know what I mean?
And stay off X where bots and trolls abound. If I go, it is usually briefly and for a fairly specific reason. Bluesky is a much more moderate source of news and views.
That's a good list.
Thanks for sharing it.
Generally good points... 14 and 15 are probs the most important in my book. They might seem stunningly obvious but they can never be restated enough.
I have to kinda disagree about algorithmic content though... Especially ads. Online ads are almost invariably there to annoy and push you to buy the "premium" service. We are now in an almost post-advertising age where the advert is not even really about the product but to get cash out of you for not seeing adverts for anything.
Rade: I think everybody needs to be careful about such things. The internet is getting ever more toxic and ever more geared toward tracking and exploiting people. I'm glad you're taking precautions.
Anvil: I never go on social media at all, unless it's following a link somebody posts. I don't see much value in it. I've read enough to know what a cesspit Twitter has become.
John: Thanks! Glad you found it worthwhile.
NickM: Hey, long time no see.
My experience with YouTube has been that it regularly pushes a lot of content that contains anger-producing elements, to a much greater extent than could be accounted for by how often I actually watch such things. It also pushes things like longer-format videos, which I actively avoid in most cases, and playlists, which I never knowingly click on.
My knowledge of ads is second-hand since I have uBlock Origin and I never see them. There seems to be a consensus that trying to make people look at more ads is now the priority for YouTube and social media platforms, though.
Much wisdom here. Thanks for sharing, Infidel!
Thank you!
I tell my brother to fact check all the time. He doesn't and people call him out.
I still go on FB, Twitter mostly. But if people act dumb, I just block them so I don't have to deal with them. Because like you said, don't argue with these people.
If he gets called out enough, hopefully he'll learn. Making a confident assertion and being proven wrong can be pretty embarrassing.
Trying to argue with profound dumbth is pointless. "If we evolved from monkeys why are there still monkeys" -- "It's a republic not a democracy" -- "Everybody who disagrees with me is a Nazi" -- you might as well try to argue with a fart.
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