08 May 2021

Video of the day -- taking one's own path

Camus was right -- "some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal."


Blogger Mary said...

This is an excellent video.I enjoyed it very much. Very wise..
I’ve always been a little different, but "fit in" well enough to have had and have some good friends. Now in my later years in life, I’m content with my quirky thoughts and sometimes uncommon interests. I do have a feeling of freer to be me than I ever had before, as I’m no longer in a position to have to please anyone but myself. It’s a freedom for sure.

08 May, 2021 06:02  
Blogger Lady M said...

I can only belong for so long to a group before I grow bored and have to find new pursuits. 3-4 years is about my max. But in that time, I try to be the best member of the group I can by taking a service or leadership role. This even applies to the atheist groups I have joined over the years. I usually stick to the ideology or hobby which prompted me to join in the first place. I just tire of the routine, politics and quite frankly, the people.

08 May, 2021 06:21  
Blogger Debra She Who Seeks said...

Great video! I concur! Guess I'm a Sigma person. But not fully or completely a Sigma person because that would be too slavish to the group, amirite?

08 May, 2021 09:09  
Blogger Jimmy T said...

Nice video. Gives voice to what is the essence of my life. It's funny, I grew up in a Navy family, always on the move to new places with differing mores. Because there was little consistency, from place to place I developed my own pathway. Eventually I met a woman who was similarly disposed. We became friends, got married, had kids, worked, then retired. But the amazing part is that after all these years, we both still believe that we became better people because we were so independent of the group ethic. Group membership is like wearing a dogs shock collar, if you stray too far you get zapped, often for nothing more than a little independence. Singularity means you only have to deal with your conscience...

08 May, 2021 09:25  
Blogger Tundra Bunny said...

Groupthink rarely ends well. I've always marched to the beat of my own drummer, and was labelled as an eccentric in my younger years. On the whole, I'm glad I took the road less travelled! Freedom has always meant more to me than conformity.

08 May, 2021 10:58  
Blogger Mike said...

Did you miss me? I've been gone for an hour tracking down the sigma male. I found that there are 6 types.


The first 5 are in ascending rank. Sigma stands alone.
You can spend a lot of time on those two sites. A lot!

08 May, 2021 12:17  
Blogger Mary Kirkland said...

I have schizotypal personality disorder...meaning I'm not 'normal' and never will be. I'm ok with that though. What is normal anyway. If you talk to a dozen people I think they would all have a different opinion on what normal is.

08 May, 2021 12:36  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I lesson I learned long ago, and sometimes I follow my own advice, is to acknowledge that it isn't simply a matter of conformity or not. You can selectively harmonize, or not. No need to be in conflict.

At a new job I note that the vast majority seem to be fans of the local college football team. I personally don't care about sports if I'm not playing. Still, I made a point of spending a few minutes a day scanning the local sports section of the local newspaper. I know the names and positions of the main players, I know the basics of their schedule, and I know the outlines of any major controversies.

I still don't care. But I am conversant in local sports. If I need to make conversation I can bring up the local team and the latest controversy. If someone starts off the conversation with 'how about that big play in the third quarter'. I know about it and can talk about it intelligently. But I still don't care and the time spent comes to a couple of minutes a week.

It pays to know the basics. It shows I care. Like knowing people's names, their position in the company, and a little something about them and their children. yes, it takes effort but the payoff is huge.

Too many people think that taking your own path means you need to be an asshole. Learn the local language. Be conversant in local issues. Respect people enough to see them as individuals and learn the basics about them. Going your own way doesn't mean being an unfeeling clod.

No, I will never go to the game. I won't be having people over to watch the game. Knowing which of your coworkers are getting married and wishing them well isn't difficult. We are not, and never will be, best buddies.

As one of my friends said 'He's a good guy, a little strange, but good'.

08 May, 2021 15:12  
Blogger Infidel753 said...

Mary: We often don't realize, until we escape the world of work, how beholden we are to the whims of others.

Lady M: Every group has internal politics, unfortunately, and many of them have at least one or two toxic people.

Debra: I'm hazy on this "sigma" concept, but I think it's basically just a term for people who don't belong to a group and especially don't care about their level in the hierarchy.

Jimmy: Sounds familiar. Breaking away from an inculcated orthodoxy often starts with the realization that many incompatible orthodoxies exist.

Bunny: Congratulations on finding the right path early.

Mike: Thanks for the info. I've been hearing about "sigma" a lot but never really seen it defined.

Mary K: There's a saying: "Everyone is normal until you get to know them."

Anon: None of that is incompatible with going your own way, so long as you don't put an excessive amount of time into it. Personally I never bothered to learn about sports. My co-workers mostly thought I had nothing interesting to say, but it was never a problem with getting along with people.

09 May, 2021 01:09  

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